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Posts Tagged ‘how to’

Resolving Paradoxes

Walk, Don't Walk sign

On your journey to self-mastery, you will sooner or later encounter paradoxes. The contradictory nature of a paradox often leads to frustration and confusion. You will be tempted to “choose a side” as it were and reject new conflicting information. That’s because to hold conflicting ideas in your head requires a good deal of mental effort and concentration, but if you can keep those thoughts in your head long enough to resolve the paradox, the reward is nothing short of an epiphany. In my own journey, I’ve found that most paradoxes can be resolved by one of the following 3 paradigm shifts. I’ll start by giving an example situation for each one.

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The Path to Happiness

a path to the ocean

What is happiness?

Happiness is not mental, physical, or chemical stimulation, though sometimes it may feel that way. Happiness must be earned.

Happiness is not excitement, the anticipation of some future pleasure. Happiness exists only in the present.

Happiness is not just contentment, the feeling that your needs have been met. Happiness also addresses your wants.

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Blue ripple

What are the attributes of a master?

Confident. You are valuable. You are worthy. Everything from good posture to deep, steady breaths, you exemplify calm. You are relaxed and at ease around powerful men and beautiful women alike. You move with deliberate purpose. You can wait patiently, comfortable in the knowledge that you will eventually get what you want. Therefore, you remain poised and unaffected by temporary setbacks.

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Behind castle walls

Words can hurt much more than sticks and stones. They can stab your heart deeper than the sharpest stick. They can pound your resolve harder than the heaviest stone. But they can also lift your spirits more than any amount of material wealth. Words have the incredible power to create or destroy belief by focusing or distorting the lenses through which you view the world.

So how do you recover from an ambush of two-faced slander? How do you deflect a barrage of insults? How do you defend against a sustained siege of condescension?

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A man waiting

Waiting can be a tortuous experience. A phone call after a job interview. A text message from a new lover. The results of your most recent checkup. Whatever the trial may be, time appears to crawl at a tortoise’s pace. You cannot force the tortoise to quicken its steps, and pining for it harder will only add weight to its shell and tar upon the road before it.

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