Choose to Take the Journey

This post is a continuation of Secrets of Charisma, part 1 and it is meant to be read in order.

7) Stop correcting.

If he makes a grammatical mistake while he’s arguing with you, don’t correct it just so you can be right about something.

If she doesn’t get the details quite right as she’s recounting your last adventure to a friend, don’t jump down her throat because of a minor detail. If it’s important, you can fill in the gaps or tell your side of the story when she’s finished.

If someone makes a mistake that can’t be corrected, stop bringing it up!　 Focus on what you can change, not on what you can’t. Make people feel good about their decisions.

8) Don’t one-up.

If he talks about what a great bargain he got on his jeans, don’t start telling him he paid too much because of how much less you paid for yours.

If she talks excitedly about how beautiful the city lights are, don’t start talking about how it’s nothing compared to this other city you were in this one time…

If she talks about how great her favorite restaurant is, don’t start discussing the merits of yours, unless it’s in jest. If you don’t like that particular restaurant, you can just say nothing. Silence is a gift.

9) Affirm them.

Sometimes it’s obvious when someone is seeking validation or craves reassurance. This may take the form of showing off, a display of pride, or an unsolicited explanation of failure. There’s no need to cut him down.

If he’s proud of a clever joke he just made, give him a fist bump. Acknowledge his wit. It’s ok, he won’t think you’re hitting on him.

If she shares her accomplishments with you, even if it’s more than you could have done, tell her how cool you think that is. Don’t compare yourself. You do your own thing. Focus on her for now.

If he boasts to you about a date he scored with a hot girl, but disguises it as a thinly veiled request for advice, tell him not to worry. Tell him he’s awesome.　 Tell him he’s money. Fight the jealousy. Don’t be a player-hater.

If she’s embarassed because her new orange dress makes her look like a pumpkin, reassure her. Tell her how it will draw attention to her beautiful hair. Just kidding. But you get the idea.

10) Win gracefully.

If you emerge victorious from a bet, enjoy your time in the sun. But don’t rub it in his face.

If your family and friends support you on the way to the top, acknowledge them. Give them credit. You are not a beautiful flower that just blossomed from a pot of dirt.

If you are already at the top of your game, there is no better time to give back. Extend a magnanimous hand. Help others get to where you are.

//Want to put my advice into practice right away? Affirm me, by commenting below :)